4/19/10

New, New, New

The blog has a new skin
the last one was nice but it was too prim and proper for me
too Joan

I like paper lanterns and it IS spring time and while I wait around for Blogger to let me upload MY OWN pic, I'll borrow this one :)

I've been wanting a new car lately
not New new...just new to me new
I think I've talked myself out of it because it's not a necessity
but just the same... I'm gonna go test drive ones I'm interested in
I like boxy cars so I'll try a Scion XB, a Honda Element, a Nissan Cube
but I'd really love to find one of these!

I still have dreams of a coolio VW Bus but for now I travel 60 miles round trip 5 days a week to work and just need something more economical. I'd LOVE to make it run on Veggie oil but being practical, it's gotta seat 5 JUST IN CASE the hub's truck isn't feelin it on a particular day.
So realistically, the Element and the mail truck are out...but a girl can dream.

I also experienced a new sensory trigger this weekend.
I'm interpreting a play at a local theater in the next month and went to preview the show yesterday.
I used to direct musical theater for kids and this particular playhouse is geared towards young actors. I also used to do a bit of acting myself so I expected to be excited about being there...
But this was different
And I've felt it before in other performances
and it was DEFINITELY a body feeling not a brain feeling because I STILL don't know how to explain it or WHY I feel it...this one is being bookmarked for Therapy!

I felt like crying
I did get teary
my chest ached...like a pining sort of feeling (or what I imagine pining to feel like)
anxious is not the right descriptive word but it's the only one I can think of
I wasn't being judgemental or thinking "I could do better" it wasn't that kind of feeling at all
I can't explain it and I don't know WHY
Maybe Ms Crawford's spirit really DID attach herself to me in 77 after she died and SHE is pining to be back on the stage....haunting

Well whatever it is I won't forget to mention it on Thursday
and...score one for me, I recognized a physical feeling and it's trigger
I might not understand the motivation...but it's progress

1 comment:

mariposai said...

I love the new layout :-) and it's great that you're learning to be more self aware...

That's so cool that you used to act, sounds like you miss it...

Sarah x