I realized I never did a follow up post and some of you may be holding your breath!
Yes, this blog is for me but I do know that I have very caring readers and just as important...I RE-READ all the time so reading resolution is important!
My email to my mom was very factual. I'm sure there were some emotions tied in there too but honestly I just cut and paste a bit of my blog entry and tweaked a few things here and there. I felt really comfortable hitting the send button and I didn't frantically check my email looking for a response.
The next morning I had two.
The first simply said, "I'm sorry. Momma"
The next one got a bit more intense and defensive...but nothing overly dramatic.
I realized there was information my mom didn't know...
In my family, we would rather know the truth...even if it might sting a little...than to hear a false complement.
If it's not true, then it's a lie.
This is simply a statement, not a character judgement
I didn't call mom a liar, I simply said she didn't tell the truth
Semantics, I know but still.
Mom admitted that she has said
she doesnt like my tattoos
she is concerned about my marriage
and she didn't like my daughter's hair
You know what...after I read that I was fine
there was closure.
Now she knows...she needs to be straight up or not say anything
The boundary has been set.
Now if it happens again, there is a standard to uphold
If it doesnt happen again...well then she's growing
Both are good outcomes :)
3 comments:
This is really good. Being open and honest is so hard, well it often is for me where a certain family member is concerned, but I'm so glad you were able to get this out in the open so that it didn't fester away in silence and become something more.
Sarah x
Glad you shared... I just checked in with your original post earlier today to see if you had followed up in the comments. It went so much smoother than I expected!
It went better than I expected too Jennifer! I can add a physical manifestation of emotion to my list...I felt peaceful, really. When I read my mother's straight forward admission, I literally felt peace in my bones...closure. Definitely a worth while exercise :)
Post a Comment